CHPS Can't Be Bad For You...

The spelling is on purpose in the title above - you'll see why shortly.  I can't tell you how many times I've been driving along America's roads, being passed willy-nilly by all manner of reckless hooligans, only to be pulled over by some copper for a stridently less severe offense.  Okay, that's a lie... I know exactly how many times I've  been pulled over.  I just don't care to share for fear of lessening your (indubitably) lofty opinion of me. :) Now, I'm not trying to rationalize my brushes with the law; if I speed I deserve to be ticketed.  Any violation of the rules of the road is, degree notwithstanding, a violation.  So what if, from my perspective, I pose a substantially smaller threat to vehicular safety than Mr. Numb S. Kull whose blatant disregard for dividing lines or any speed less than that of light renders him a a danger on par with nuclear detonations?  Indeed.

Today, however, one of those amazing events that you always hope to witness took place.  I was driving to work and was cut off by one of those little morons who drive like every road is an audition stage for "Fast and Furious: part 6."  I don't generally become incensed when I'm cut off... I understand that oftentimes one is in a position to make a last minute decision that might impede upon the boundaries of another's personal car space.  It happens.  Except, when it happens like it did today, I seem to mind a good deal more.  This daft little beast of a driver who seemed to be propelled by raw adolescent testosterone proceeded to cut off every other driver, weaving in and out of two lanes of traffic & eventually using a turning lane to pass somebody whose pace didn't suit him.  Again, I typically attempt to err on the side of understanding.  He was headed in the general direction of the hospital - what if his buddy was bleeding out as a result of some horrifically misguided experiment involving bladed kitchen appliances and explosives?  In such an instance I'd be more than accommodating while doling out irrelevant judgments.  This was just not that instance.  Larry & Moe were, by contrast, laughing and pointing & banging their empty heads to some long-forgotten 80's metal band.  It was maybe this irreverent dismissal of a corporate responsibility for safety that lead to my not-so-quiet exultation when, several car lengths ahead of me, I saw a reasonably nondescript SUV light up with telltale red and blue beams.  They had just succeeded in cutting off a Highway Patrol Vehicle and were promptly pulled over. I think I should feel some sense of compassion, as if those of us targeted by the 'authorities' share something akin to camaraderie, but really - I'm just thrilled they were caught.  I hope the freakin' punks got kicked off the road.